On the day before he was assassinated, John F. Kennedy told one of his favorite stories: “The Irish writer Frank O’Connor wrote how, as a boy, he and his friends would make their way across the countryside. When they came to an orchard wall that seemed too high and too doubtful to try and too difficult to permit their voyage to continue, they took off their hats and tossed them over the wall – and then they had no choice but to follow them.” Kennedy concluded, “This nation has tossed its cap over the wall of space, and we have no choice but to follow it.”
Fast forward. My best friend once told me, “The only way to be happy, is to BE happy.” You know, choose it. Just as from the moment you learn to ski you are a skier (or from the moment you go to space you are a space traveler), just choose it and keep going.
But how do we choose what to choose? A couple of years ago I noticed that amongst my fellow ad school grads, the ones who received the highest-salaried job offers just happened to come from the wealthiest backgrounds. Similarly, friends who grew up in the upper-middle-class town next to mine are now a couple of multi-millionaire entrepreneurs and a newly-crowned “starchitect.” My buddies from my not-quite-middle-class suburb? A head of a YMCA. A Park & Rec Director. A NYC high school Principal. And a (now former) middle-management Wall Streeter. In all cases, every single one of them has achieved exactly what he put his mind to. They have chosen their outcome.
This made me wonder, could I re-align my self-expectations? If our outcomes originate simply from what we learn to be “normal,” could I choose a new normal?
So what the hell, I tried it out. Like a parent trying to motivate his 5 year old, I told myself that I could be anything I choose. And I choose to be a caring and generous employee/partner/leader. Someone who creates from “Yes!” like we learned in improv class. An engaging presenter who only wins if you win. A creative who makes you think “F*ck I Wish I Did That” but who also has a healthy work/life balance as well. A stable provider for my family and — starting today — a non-smoker.
All I know is that the harder I work, the more magic happens. So whether I’m employed today or “available for freelance,” what I do with those opportunities is my choice.
Adam Kuhr is a freelance ACD/CW based out of New York City
13 Comments
Adam (and Eric),
Thanks for a great, honest (and dare I say) and inspirational post. I needed it this Friday. Why is it that all my favorite advertising people are from scrappy, non-entitled backgrounds? Good luck with your new normal.
Very nice.
Should be read in conjunction with the “I always get parking” post that Erik put up a while ago.
In an industry based on connection it does often seem like those who already have keep receiving. I think the end, those who had to scrape by, and earn every bit, probably appreciate it more.
Thanks for the post. I always love that little bit of needed inspiration.
Increasingly impressed with what I find over at Please Don’t Feed The Animals http://tinyurl.com/cgkkmt
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Increasingly impressed with what I find over at Please Feed The Animals http://tinyurl.com/cgkkmt (via @eschenck)
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Wow. In the ad world, this is considered a daring post. Those of us on same journey just say, Amen. I thank the economy for bringing positive folks like you and Erik out of hiding. (And now, me, too.) I’d say “Good Luck”, but you & I know it’s not about luck. Thanks again. Well done!
p.s. I always get parking,too.
@AdamKuhr I am so loving your Friday post on http://tinyurl.com/cgkkmt . I would propose marriage, but maybe we should meet first.
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very cool site for unemployed ad peoples. RT @eproulx RT @sallyhogshead RT @eschenck Please Feed The Animals http://tinyurl.com/cgkkmt
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Adam and Erik, I am hoping that you keep throwing your hats over that wall. As I know I will always throw my hat over every wall that stands before me. I enjoy the honesty in which you share with us your posts. Thank you both. And best to all that share my desire to better thyself.
@eschenck Impressing you, Ernie, may be one of my greatest career achievements yet. http://tinyurl.com/cgkkmt
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@AdamKuhr Loved the piece http://bit.ly/LpeGZ
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Erik:
Thank you for sharing this post with me. Based on my email to you, its relevance is spot on. I appreciate your time and response!
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